Redneck Ambulance in Russia

July 20, 2009

And you thought America had a bad healthcare system …

 

Want to go for a little boat ride ?

Want to go for a little boat ride ?

REDNECK POETRY CONTEST

July 16, 2009

THE NATIONAL POETRY CONTEST HAD COME DOWN TO TWO:
A YALE GRADUATE AND A REDNECK FROM TENNESSEE
THEY WERE GIVEN A WORD, THEN ALLOWED
TWO MINUTES TO STUDY THE WORD AND COME UP WITH A POEM.

THE WORD THEY WERE GIVEN WAS ‘ TIMBUKTU ‘.

FIRST TO RECITE HIS POEM WAS THE YALE GRADUATE. HE
STEPPED TO THE MICROPHONE AND SAID:

‘SLOWLY ACROSS THE DESERT SAND,
TREKKED A LONELY CARAVAN.
MEN ON CAMELS, TWO BY TWO,
DESTINATION: TIMBUKTU ‘

THE CROWD WENT CRAZY!
NO WAY COULD THE REDNECK TOP THAT.

AS THE REDNECK CALMLY MADE HIS WAY TO THE
MICROPHONE AND RECITED:

‘ME AND TIM, A’ HUNTIN’ WE WENT.
MET THREE GALS IN A POP-UP TENT.
THEY WAS THREE, AND WE WAS TWO.
SO I BUCKED ONE, AND TIMBUKTU .’

THE REDNECK WON.

Redneck Church

July 10, 2009

Rednecks can be found all over the world. Here is an example of Rednecks in Russia …

We need to light a candle, join hands, and sing "Coom-Ba-Ya" !!!

We need to light a candle, join hands, and sing "Coom-Ba-Ya" !!!

Redneck Fishing Tournament

July 8, 2009

Where using rods and reels are too technologically challenging to the Rednecks … Nets are used …

This one's mine, You got the last one Bubba !!!

This one's mine, You got the last one Bubba !!!

 

Wait for it, Wait for it.

Wait for it, Wait for it.

 

And if you do not have a good net, you better have a good dog ..

 

Man, I am glad we brought Brutus !!!

Man, I am glad we brought Brutus !!!

National Geographic to film rednecks in Bath

July 8, 2009

- When: Friday and Saturday

- Where: On the riverfront in Bath

- Details: First fishing heat is 1 to 3 p.m. Friday, second is 5 to 7 p.m. Friday. Fishing continues for kids ages 2-12 from 9 to 10 a.m. Saturday; the third heat is 1 to 3 p.m. Saturday, with the final heat from 5 to 7 p.m.

- Entertainment: Lakeside Sunday will perform from 2 to 6 p.m. Friday, and Southern Cross Band will play from 8 p.m. to midnight. On Saturday, Jessie & The South Band will perform from 2 to 6 p.m. and Phatt Kitty Band will be from 8 p.m. to midnight.

Check it out here….

http://www.pjstar.com/news/x727289243/National-Geographic-to-film-rednecks-in-Bath

Redneck signs are all around us … literally !!!

July 7, 2009

Everywhere we look we see some Redneck things happening around us. This is no exception. Take a look ….

 

This is why Rednecks are always lost.

This is why Rednecks are always lost.

 

If you think that’s funny. Check this out…..

 

http://www.masalatime.com/?p=4159

You know you are dating a Redneck when …

July 6, 2009
I hope my horns do not show.

I hope my horns do not show.

You have more antlers hanging on your wall than family portraits

Don’t eat the Beans !!!

July 3, 2009

This is what happens when you eat too many beans on the 4th of July …

Man those beans burn my ass !!!

Man those beans burn my ass !!!

Check out this – a Redneck Harley

July 2, 2009

Redneck Harley

You Know you are a Redneck when …

July 1, 2009

 

Brand new edition of… ‘You know you’re a redneck when…. ‘

 

1. You take your dog for a walk and you both use the same tree.

2. You can entertain yourself for more than 15 minutes with a fly swatter.

3. Your boat has not left the driveway in 15 years.

4. You burn your yard rather than mow it.

5. You think ‘The Nutcracker’ is a vice on the work bench.

6. The Salvation Army declines your furniture.

7. You offer to give someone the shirt off your back and they don’t want it.

8. You have the local taxidermist on speed dial.

9. You come back from the dump with more than you took.

10. You keep a can of Raid on the kitchen table.

11. Your wife can climb a tree faster than your cat.

12. Your grandmother has ‘ammo’ on her Christmas list.

13. You keep flea and tick soap in the shower.

14. You’ve been involved in a custody fight over a hunting dog.

15. You go to the stock car races and don’t need a program.

16. You know how many bales of hay your car will hold.

17.. You have a rag for a gas cap.

18. Your house doesn’t have curtains, but your truck does.

19. You wonder how service stations keep their rest-rooms so clean.

20. You can spit without opening your mouth.

21. You consider your license plate personalized because your father made it.

22. Your lifetime goal is to own a fireworks stand.

23. You have a complete set of salad bowls and they all say ‘Cool Whip’ on the side.

24. The biggest city you’ve ever been to is Wal-Mart.

25. Your working TV sits on top of your non-working TV.

26. You’ve used your ironing board as a buffet table.

27. A tornado hits your neighborhood and does $100,000 worth of improvements.

28. You’ve used a toilet brush to scratch your back.

29. You missed your 5th grade graduation because you were on jury duty.

30. You think fast food is hitting a deer at 65.


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